July 14, 2015

Where have all the bad perms gone?  They’re Here! (see pic below)

Today for my “chemo chair headshot” you see my hair, still mostly wet, no dryer, no curlers, etc.  I used conditioner, leave-in condition spray and Chi silk oil.  I’ve been advised to find a tub of cream cholesterol.  (Bad for the High Blood Pressure, but good for the hair?!)  This is one of the side effects of my particular mix of chemo.  So far, I’m experiencing only a small amount of hair loss daily.  It seems the hair dropping out is the straight, thick strands.  What replaces it is thin, very curly, and stiffly dry.  Totally reminiscent of the Rave(TM) home perms I had 30 – 35 years ago!

I know how vain I sound reflecting about hair.  I’m sitting in Virginia Cancer Institute’s 25 chair Infusion room.  All the chairs are full as I’m in my chemo ‘spa’ mode for the next 4 hours.  Looking around, I see a couple of ladies with tastefully sequined scarf-caps, some who are sporting ‘new growth’ hair, and men with crewcuts, bald tops, bad combovers, and cue-ball heads. (Hard to tell if this is their pre-treatment ‘norm’ or chemo related hair loss)!  There are several women, like me who’ve kept their own hair – for today, anyway.  Mine gets stuck in the tape and the IV lines.  Pull it back, and the driest strands break off.  This is my new normal for now.

Before March 8  (Diagnosis Day) I had NO idea that something bigger than a can of green beans was growing and multiplying inside me.  It goes to show. you seldom really know what’s on the inside.  You can have “it” and not know you have “it”. In this way, cancer is like faith – and vice-versa.  When you know “it’s” there – after it’s tested and tried – you can call upon “it” for strength, purpose and direction.  You find that sharing your experiences with “it” helps to encourage others.  Having “it” changes your identity, your purpose, and your appreciation for things mundane, small and hidden.  You begin to look for “it” in others, and when you find someone else with “it”, you share your heart, your ‘journey-tales’; they become a part of your larger family, a part of community. These are the things that make having “it” special.

I hope you all never have to discover your “it” if “it” is cancer, but statistically 1 in every 3 of us (speaking of U.S. Females) will.  1 in 2 U.S. Males will – if they live long enough – develop the “it” of cancer.  I hope all of you have discovered your “it” of faith. I have a feeling that the statistics for having a real faith is substantially lower than cancer.  From where I sit now, I know I am fortunate to have both “it”s at the same time.  Cancer has tested and proved my faith, and faith has purposed and enlightened my cancer.

Thankful for research and improved treatments – in cancer AND hair products – Here’s to “good hair days” AND finding and checking your “its”.

Love you all.  Keep the prayers, wishes and laughter headed my way,

Susan

P.S.  Results from yesterday’s CT and MRI scans show an additional 50% reduction in the 2 liver tumors!!!

Susan Randolph Braden